Now my friends and I have been viewing "G.I. JOE: The Rise Of Cobra" as a train wreck waiting for you to buy a ticket...
Could we be wrong?
"The best action movie of the summer? Now you know!
First off, if you liked the cartoon, this is the live action version of the cartoon. I had all the figures, the vehicles, the aircraft carrier, everything when I was a kid growing up. This movie is exactly how I imagined it would be when I was playing with these figures. Kids are going to love this flick. Why the hell couldn't this have been made when I was 9 years old? I'm so jealous of you little bastards who get to see this through the eyes of a child. You are going to love it"
- George 'El Guapo' Roush, Latino Review
"GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra manages to almost perfectly replicate the experience you had as a pre-teen playing with your action figures in the back yard. Like a kid banging his toys together and blowing them up with firecrackers, Sommers has made a movie that's just a series of action set pieces strung together with a minimal amount of exposition, stopping only to catch his breath and to move the story along far enough to get to the next action set piece. And damn if it doesn't work."
- Devin Faraci, CHUD
"But the fact is, this is an entertaining popcorn flick that knows exactly how to shake things up.
G.I. Joe may not be a great movie, but it sure is a hoot and a half, just make sure to find that inner child in you that still likes to play pretend."
- Jimmy O, JoBlo
"Though likely to divide critics, “G.I. Joe” could become the coolest event of late summer movie-going, with strong prospects of becoming another bonanza franchise for Paramount."
- Emanuel Levy
"Well, I've seen G.I. JOE and I'll tell anyone that works for the studio that hiding this film is a whopper of a mistake that I hope isn't too late to correct.
This is not going to be a glowing review of a flawless film. What this will be is a very good review of a movie that most critics will shit all over upon release because they didn't get to see it early, and most audiences will devour with both hands."
Capone, Ain't It Cool News
"Finally, after a yawn inducing summer, we get a big-budget popcorn flick worthy of escapist fun. "G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra" has been vastly underestimated. The film is action packed, moves like a breeze, and has the guts to be a little daring.
G.I. Joe is the fun ride that Transformers should have been. The summer ends on a high note. Not to be missed in the theater."
- Movie Web
_______________________________________________________________________"The movie is pure escapist fun and this summer’s best action film.
There is so much about this movie that is so damn cool.
But overall, it’s Stephen Sommer’s best film and work to date. Tonally, the film captures what G.I. JOE is all about and at times like it’s like the Marvel panels came to life.
I’m going to see this film at least another two times and I highly recommend that you check it out too.
I had a blast folks…"
- El Mayimbe, Latino Review
"Gi Joe is pure escapist nonsense - and all the better for it. Loud, visually impressive and great fun... I liked it a whole lot more than the Transformers sequel."
- Mark Adams, Mirror UK
"But ya know what? It IS a G.I. JOE movie and it was pretty damn cool! What makes it cool is that these are still men and women operating amazing technology that WE created ( moderately fictitiously) and that isn’t GIVEN by Aliens, Future Beings, etc. That’s what makes it cool, that and the notion that we work with a Global coalition of cool folks that are capable of crazy awesome with this stuff."
- Harry Knowles, Ain't It Cool News
"And in spite of many misgivings, including ropey CGI, convoluted storytelling and a smattering of horribly over-the-top performances, G.I. Joe is a blast from start-to-finish.
It's the opposite of cerebral moviemaking, but if you're prepared to check your brain at the door, then G.I. Joe is summer blockbusting of the most entertaining kind.
It also set things up perfectly for a sequel, and on this evidence, IGN would be more than happy to spend another couple of hours in the company of the Joes."
- Chris Tilly, IGN UK
"To say that I'm ready for a teched-up, nostalgia-trip live-action adaptation would be an understatement. Remarkably, G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra succeeds on exactly that level: as a high-powered, good-versus-bad adventure that offers no subtlety or substance, Stephen Sommers' film captures the silly energy that made the series such a childhood favorite and finds a way to fulfill the expectations of fanboys from 13 to 30 (okay, 33) in the process."
- Todd Gilchrist, SciFi Wire
"It is with much surprise that one can report that director Stephen Sommers has more than redeemed himself after Van Helsing with this fun-filled, adrenalin charged action film whose sole purpose is to entertain its core male demographic audience with some superbly orchestrated action scenes, stylishly and energetically crafted in a taut, entertaining cinematic package.
With its often subtle tongue-in-cheek humor, G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra is pure escapist fun, put together in an exhilarating way whose simple message is: Have fun and do not take this seriously. It’s adrenalin charged, exciting and entertaining way to spend two hours in a movie theatre, and gthis could easily emerge as the biggest surprise and sleeper hit of the summer."
- Paul Fischer, Dark Horizons
"I usually don't review much here on AICN; there are plenty of people around who review regularly and I don't wish to be redundant.
This said, I'm unable to keep my mouth shut about G.I. JOE: THE RISE OF COBRA - primarily because I've spent the last year and a half kicking the film, knocking Stephen Sommers (whose VAN HELSING I still regard as one of the most overwrought, self-indulgent pieces of pap to hit screens in many years), and negatively prejudging the capabilities of nearly everyone involved with this project.
I was wrong. I'm here to say it, and I'm happy to admit it. I was wrong.
G.I. JOE is big, OTT, intellectually challenged, and idiotic as they come - which could certainly describe nearly ever other Stephen Sommers film to date. But it's also a helluva lot more fun than they are, and here's why..."
- Merrick, Ain't It Cool News
"Despite the brou-ha-ha that has been talked about for months and currently about the state of the film, ‘G.I Joe: Rise of the Cobra’ is a pure adrenaline fantasy and fun ride. With its non-stop action and explosive scenes, Stephen Sommers has brought back some of the elements that made his first film, ‘The Mummy,’ a big hit. Fans of the Hasbro toys and the cartoon series will get a hoot at seeing their favorite characters on the big screen, specifically the battle between Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow. That alone is worth the price of admission. This is totally a first-rate entertainment to end the summer."
- Wilson Morales, BlackFilm.com
"Well, it's time to let Sommers out of director jail, folks, because his latest film "G.I. Joe: The Rise Of Cobra" is big, ridiculous, and way more fun than I would have thought possible. It is a summer movie, through and through, pure pulp preposterousness, and it is one of the most successful little-boy adventure movies I've seen in a long time"
- Drew McWeeny, HitFlix
"Video game and comic book sensibilities to the fore, G.I. Joe is cool. The word is used a couple of times, but it's way cooler than that implies. Youngsters (anyone up to about 24) will whisper 'cool' with jaws dropped every 85 seconds or so, as the gizmos, gadgets, weapons and other toys of the future flash before their eyes. The effects are riveting, from the big bangs to the smaller trinkets, like miniature mechanical bugs that eat anything. That's the new weapon of the future, and it's made by MARS Corp, which sells arms to all sides; it also sells defensive gear, just to make sure the whole market is covered. Obviously, weapons manufacturers take the brunt of the odium in this film"
- Andrew L. Urban, Urban Cinefile
And there are even a few more reviews out there, but I think you get the gist of it. Even over at Rotten Tomatoes the rating for this film is a strikingly high 91%. Whoa. I'm man enough to admit when I'm wrong. Come Friday, I'll find out if I'm a man or a mouse.